29 Jan 2019

26 years to this day...  Such a mixed feeling...
Aftermath of riots in Mumbai,  getting married and totally unsure of where i was headed.  Yet i decided to brave it,  get on with it.  Finish the obligation to family and society. Not a great way to get into such a commitment and it didn't last, i was really not ready for it.
However he was a very dear friend. Whatever karma that was, i learned a lot from it.  A wonderful family i got to live in.

And now.... though the marriage got over long back, I wasn't prepared for this one.  Last year ended leaving me wondering about our mortality. He passed away. No one knows when who will go, without even bidding adieu,  so hold no grudges.  I am glad we didn't. I Love You.
Go in peace good friend. I thank you.
Happy 26th!

My Soul Mother

Today is 16th Jan 2019
Contentment is....
At 50, when Ma feeds me with her own hands,  i feel there is nothing left to ask for anymore.
It it's difficult to express a relation between two people,  a generation apart and in love and missing each other. I have dreams of us doing things together. It is unfortunate that we have so much to share and talk about. Not just gossip,  but that to 😄
Yet we are circumstantially challenged. I don't really ask for this,  but in her case and my father's i do. To be born again and in a more positive environment, where we are together and able to share all that we could not in this life. Books,  music, songs, stories, colors, clothes, food and so much more.
My mother did not give birth to me. However i am so glad she is my one and only Ma. We are soul connects from many lives i feel.
On this day off sankranti,  her feeding me with her hands was the ultimate blessing. I cannot live without her and yet i do. Somehow i manage. She is a most beautiful and intelligent soul. My prayers always that she be healthy and strong.
Ma,  I love you.