I am actually stumped in the most unexpected manner.
A 34 yr old successful young man died by suicide... SUICIDE!
This is heart breaking!
It doesn't matter that he was a film star, known to all of us. What matters is, he chose to die. So young, so beautiful, so successful, so loved...
His giving up is not just a giving up, but a failure of life. When the superficial life, that the corporations have created, one that we are led to believe in, and to live within, failed.
It just failed. It fails to answer my questions!
A physically and financially healthy young man dies, from a weakness of mind and spirit, that surfaces in this lockdown.
In the lockdown, there is nothing between life and me, no work, no activity, no social distraction. Fear ruling my conscience. Wondering why is this happening, when will it end, what are we going to do? Life has changed. Nothing is going to be the way it was. I look in the mirror and wonder, who is this person, what does it want? If life was so simple, how did i let the demon take a grip of me. The demon of "doing something", "becoming something", "utilising my talent", "becoming succesful" etc. When did it take complete control of that simple me, who was satisfied with life. There was contentment, completeness. When and how did that demon make way?
We are locked within the wall of the corporate compartment all the time. All walls made of Mirrors, showing us a vast space and a tempting picture, even though we are actually locked in a small corporate compartment. We get used to leading the artificial life.
Then the corporate walls cracked, the mirrors chipped and through it we noticed, that we are living a lie. Suddenly the truth of life is unbearable.
In the lockdown, there is nothing between life and me, no work, no activity, no social distraction. Fear ruling my conscience. Wondering why is this happening, when will it end, what are we going to do? Life has changed. Nothing is going to be the way it was. I look in the mirror and wonder, who is this person, what does it want? If life was so simple, how did i let the demon take a grip of me. The demon of "doing something", "becoming something", "utilising my talent", "becoming succesful" etc. When did it take complete control of that simple me, who was satisfied with life. There was contentment, completeness. When and how did that demon make way?
We are locked within the wall of the corporate compartment all the time. All walls made of Mirrors, showing us a vast space and a tempting picture, even though we are actually locked in a small corporate compartment. We get used to leading the artificial life.
Then the corporate walls cracked, the mirrors chipped and through it we noticed, that we are living a lie. Suddenly the truth of life is unbearable.
The betrayal is devastating.
All this glamour on the wall, cannot take care of ME. All this was a lie. A lie that contributes nothing to my life. I am just a pawn. I don't condemn the dream merchants / the mirrors, but does it own me? I look at the screen and believe it to be real, but what about the real Life?
Then i look into the mirror. i see a reflection in it. I ask the Mirror on the Wall, what was this all about? Do you really believe that you control all of me, my will power and my life?
Nope, you don't.
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